Stop telling me I'm not enough, society! And how I combat that with food... (yes, that statement is loaded and will unpack that another day, chill y'all)

Mind blown.  A heart-felt chat tonight with my good friend S has led to a discussion about the insurmountable pressure that women and now, as mothers, we feel to be perfect.  So here's my work that I need to do in this lifetime, and I'm not talking, "Hey, this is what I do for a living" but work that I have to put in to undo bad lessons on how to attain, keep and let go of love.  Here's my story in a nutshell: first generation born here to hard-working immigrant parents.  Luck of the lot to be the eldest of an entire gaggle of first-gen born whose motivation to succeed was sparked by not feeling "enough".. i.e. not white enough, not rich enough, not smart enough, not travelled enough, not liked enough, not interesting enough, not knowledgeable enough, not pretty enough, not mothering enough, not....ugh.. ENOUGH ALREADY!  Due to not feeling enough ended up in a thoroughly abusive relationship, a perverse sense of self, shitloads of debt and the belief that I'm the victim and martyr in most things.  All good things are not of my own merit but have been bestowed upon me in some law of karma.

What. the. fuck.

Thankfully through on-going therapy, self-imposed leave and borrowed time, I'm reaffirming that we are enough, and human enough to be loved.  And who better to love ourselves than us?  So, a lot of my goals have been to figure out... what the fuck do I really like to do that is not used as a tool to impress others to show that.. well... I'm a deserving and whole human being.  Heavy shit, right?

The one consistent thing that has always helped me self-soothe and has always served as a homecoming of identity so to speak has been food: eating it, cooking it, talking about it, reading about it, arguing about it, creating it and using it as a means to gather.  So, even blogging about food, which I guess this post is kind of about... has truth been told.... healing.  With H nursing a sore throat on the eve of the summer solstice and Miss M basically just being a picky toddler, I will share my go-to chicken ginger soup recipe that I had to dole out yesterday impromptu to heal those around me and frankly to heal myself.

Je Suis Gutom's easy Chicken Ginger Soup (which is inspired by my mother-in-law's version, got to give credit where credit is due!)

Ingredients:
-4 cups of water
-chicken backs or bones (I used the leftovers from the Chicken Afritada I made earlier this week and froze the rest in the freezer.  Any bone-in chicken pieces will do).
-2 inch knob of ginger, peeled and cut into medallions (I take the back of a spoon to scrape the peel off which I learned from another blog... works like a charm!)
-2 cloves of garlic, crushed
-any vegetables on hand, I threw in baby spinach and some leftover mushrooms but onions, carrots and celery work just as well
-a splash of fish sauce (salt works just fine)
-1/2 tsp of ground pepper (but adjust to taste)

Demarche:
1. Place chicken back, ginger, garlic and water in large saucepan and set to boil on medium.
2. Once boiled, set to simmer and leave for thirty minutes covered
3. Add vegetables and cook just until tender.
4. Serve hot and with a smile

That's it!  Mic drop.  Take that yucky feelings and bacteria! It's just enough to soothe your soul (or to make a quick dinner... really, ha!)